You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize