North Korea, Best Korea!
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
