I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Randomize
