Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
