No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
