lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
