It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
you inspire me to be a worse person
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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