I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Just pee around me
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize