if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
