just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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