Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
