I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
I wish I only lived at night.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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