I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
