Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize