it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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