He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
