playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
