wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
