think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize