Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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