you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
