So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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