you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
there is glitter all over my balls
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