So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Randomize
