i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
