yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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