I love hooters. This dumb bartender is saying how coffee dehydrates you so that's why she sometimes just eats the coffee grinds wake up.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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