The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
