god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
