dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
