its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
this just has baby written all over it
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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