I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
