The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Randomize
