I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
