Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize