Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
