heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
