you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Naked. naked and bneed help.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
