No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
