She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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