Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
