Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
But theres a keg here and me gusta
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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