I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
