Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
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