I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Whatever my ex gf's roomates talked shit about me so I jizzed in their shampoo bottle one night
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
two words...techno handjob
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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