Define "chronic" masturbator.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
Don't EVER smell your tampon
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
