can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
