I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
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