That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I smell like Dick and happiness
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
