this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
found the other keg... it's in the tree
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
The ideal thing to do next party is to tape my boobs down so they don't knock over the pong cups while playing defense. They came back to hurt us this time
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Got wasted in a little tiki hut by the beach yesterday. Woke up with a coconut and half of a mushroom burger in my purse. I also have a picture of our Romanian bartender's fingernails on my phone lol
Why do you always wake up with meat in your purse?
Randomize
