it was like his penis was on wheels.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
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