Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
